Big Love Watch: Breaking Up Is Hard to Do
SPOILER ALERT: If you haven't watched last night's Big Love, watch out for that Holy Spirit sucker punch.
HBO photo: Lacey Terrell
Last week we watched Bill take off his ring with Ana in the diner and wondered: was it love or was it lust? Turns out it was love--just on a different person's part. Ginnifer Goodwin got a showcase last night, as Margene found herself growing more and more smitten with Bill's Serbian prospective fourth wife, only to have her heart broken when things didn't work out. (Or, that is, didn't work out for Bill.)
It was another example of how Big Love continues to confound our knee-jerk expectations of what the dynamics must be like in a plural marriage--some of those expectations, to be fair, set up by the early episodes of the show. The pilot and the early part of the first season focused much more on competition among wives: the calendars, the sharing, the power relations between the Boss Lady and the second and third wives. But the show seemed to realize that it didn't have much future as a series without showing why three very different women would want to be in a multiple marriage, as well as sometimes chafe against it, and that has made Big Love a richer show.
The irony is that, as Bill contemplates popping the fourth question to Ana, he and his poly-hubby buddies assume that Margene would be threatened by a new wife--the same assumption that, I'm betting, most monogamous viewers of the show would make. "Remind her that earthly increase is the due of every righteous man," suggests Don Embry. Yeah. That'll do it.
In fact, as this plot played out, it showed what a nuanced view of the marriage the show has developed. On the one hand, we see that Margene, for all her insecurities, genuinely embraces polygamy; meeting Ana, she not only falls in sister-love with her, but falls back in love with Barb and Nicki, convinced that Ana will only make the family stronger. ("She'll love Barb! She'll grow to love Nicki!") But she wants Ana for herself--not just for Bill--and even naive, guileless Margene pushes back against the patriarchical assumptions of the setup, asking why she shouldn't be involved in choosing a new wife, too.
All of which explains why it surprises me that it surprises so many other people that Big Love is popular among women. Bill may have three wives, but there are four spouses in this marriage, and he's outnumbered.
In the meantime, I'll be curious to see what happens with the newly surfaced Greene family, who threaten to make Roman's clan seem wholesome. (Bill's video poker adventure, it turns out, nearly came back to brand him in the ass, literally.) And I'm looking forward to getting back to the compound next week. Other favorite beats from this episode:
* Nicki's response to Barb's attempt to make peace in the diner: "It's like talking to a fortune cookie." No one does contemptuous like Chloe Sevigny.
* Likewise enjoyed Nicki's clumsily attempt to trick Rhonda away from Heather's house. (Nicki manages to take over even episodes where she's on the margins.) "We want to tell your story too. But television. Bill owns a TV station."
* Love that Ben takes the car out for his first solo drive to sneak out, not to his girlfriend, but to a bishop, to confess to nailing his girlfriend. Double-love the handful of pamphlets the bishop gives him, including "Satan's Thrust." I call dibs on that as a band name.
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1
James...i know this is off topic...but please tell me you watched the victoria beckham special last night...it was too funny! I'd love to read your thoughts on it.
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2
Is it stranger that women watch a show about polygamy, or that an atheist like me watches one about faith? I loved that Margene thought she could get Ana back in the fold by teaching her to fake pray, and it did make me wonder if Margene actually believes in everything that Bill does -- that through living the principle they will all be reunited in eternity, like in the opening credits. Of course everyone has a right to their faith, but I'm skeptical when the rules were written entirely by men. Notice that Don didn't mention anything about righteous women being entitled to "earthly increase". I don't think there's a difference between what Ben feels for his girlfriend and what Bill felt for Ana and for Margene. Yet one is a sin and one is divine inspiration. Is that the Holy Spirit in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?
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3
Well, count me as an atheist, or at least firmly agnostic, fan of the show. I think it would be much easier, and less rewarding, for HBO to simply have set up the show to critique or satirize its characters' faith. One of the many things I love about this show is that--even as HBO is constantly attacked for making shows that undermine values--it has also made a show that treats faith far more earnestly and seriously than any network touched-by-an-angel treatment has.
To me, that's just an authentic exploration of one aspect of being human, which makes it worth watching whatever I personally believe, or rather don't believe.
As for Margene, I think we saw a sign--with her slipping into a Catholic saint prayer a couple weeks ago--that she has not necessarily bought in wholly to Bill's faith. (She was probably a cafeteria Catholic who became a cafeteria polygamist.) But I don't think that means she has bought in any less wholly to the marriage.
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4
I thought the funniest part of the show was Bill comforting Margene in the car...what an absurd plot twist, her and Bill speculating about why it could never be between them and Ana. It's a challenge to me to believe that the women do find love with each other...I kind of picture female lions or apes banding together with the alpha male...but something tells me that if this could really work men would have made it happen long ago. Too many beta males? And it is still pretty unclear what happens to the young boys...how does the system work that out. I like the way Ben and Sara are a microcosm of the possibilities for the next generation. And Rhonda!!!...Kiss Off!
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5
I think we have gotten some hints that Bill was an example of what happens to the young males in the compounds. (I.e., he was dumped in the streets of SLC as a young teen and left to fend for himself, IIRC.)
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6
I'm always surprised how entertaining Big Love manages to be on a weekly basis. I was definitely cheering when Barb stuck it to the cop.
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7
I love this show, but this a funny point my wife and I always notice: Who is taking care of the kids?
All three wives managed to make it out for lunch together, by themselves, but what about the 7 kids who are under 5 years of age??!! Where are they?
As the parent of a 1-year-old, and know how much effort it takes to supervise just one little kid, this cracks me up.
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8
To me, Big Love, is simply damn good television, full of intrigue and fun.
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9
Kevin_ATL: There are seven children total, two of whom are teenagers, NOT seven kids under age 5. One is 9 or 10, one is 4, another 6, and a 3 and a 1 year old. Five kids needing babysitting, which is easily provided by either the 16 year old son or 18 year old daughter.
As the parent of four children under age 8, and knowing how much effort it takes to supervise them, I know that while it can be a lot of effort, it in fact can be done by a responsible teenager.
Your "funny point" is really a non-issue.
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10
Just for fun, I thought I'd mention that "Satan's Thrust" was not just picked from thin air as a name for that brochure. It actually is based on a chapter title of a book by a former Church president. See http://www.ldsmedia.com/article/view/380181
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11
Best. Episode. Ever!!! I've always loved Big Love and felt a strange and unique connection to it, but this episode truly reached new heights. How can one show tackle such controversial subject matter so thoroughly, while remaining genuinely funny, earnest and utterly convincing?
You asked in an earlier thread who should be nominated for an emmy. Two words: Big Love!
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12
Did anyone catch the line in the scene where Bill is talking to some other men about having found Ana, and another man in the group tells a story about how he told his "newest wife" that he'd found another wife. She threw a fit and it took HIM a week to trust HER again.
I love how the show twists our understanding of certain values and turns it upside down.
Most of the audience, myself included, likely thought that the Ana plot would involve Barb's, Nicky's and Margene's reaction to his wanting a fourth wife, when it became about Margene's disappointment instead.
- poniewozik Loved the season. Mrs Tuned In wd have put u on the main list RT @boredtodeath Thank u for incl us in Time's Top 10. We'll take hon mention. - 6 hours ago
- poniewozik @carr2n Virgin is the best, LAX-JFK - 7 hours ago
- poniewozik Did NPR interview abt multiscreen multitasking. After, automatically reached for iPhone in pocket. Like don draper wd have for cigarettes. - 8 hours ago
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