A blog about television by TIME’s TV critic James Poniewozik.

The Church of Probst

I'm a secular Jew (Mom's side) from a half-Catholic family (Dad's side), so except for weddings and funerals, neither side of me usually makes it into a temple or church on Saturday or Sunday.

What I have instead is Thursday night. I still watch Survivor regularly, good seasons or bad. The current one, Gabon, has a fairly decent cast, if not one of the all-time best: I love bespectacled old Bob and am amused by secret Olympian Crystal, who hasn't shown much athletic firepower but evidently must have gold-medaled in whining. 

But mostly what Survivor gives me is a sense of ritual. Most reality competitions are like this to an extent, but Survivor is so faithful to its pageantry, script and formality that Jeff Probst seems less like a host than a kind of priest. Just as in a religious service, once you've watched enough Survivors, you can feel the rhythms of the narrative in your bones. It's like a mass, with the same regular ritual incantations: 

"Want to know what you're playing for?" ... "In addition, the winning tribe will send one member of the losing tribe to Exile Island. Worth playing for?" ... "Survivors ready. Go!" ... "______ wins reward!" ... "[Losing tribe name]: I've got nothing for you." ... "We now bring in _____, returning from Exile Island. We're now ready to get to today's challenge. First things first..." ... "On my go."... "_____ wins immunity!" ... "I'll go tally the votes." ... "______th person voted out of Survivor: Gabon.... The tribe has spoken. Grab your torches, head back to camp."

Whenever I struggle to understand why people watch shows like Law & Order, which so strictly follows its formula week after week, I have to remind myself of my attachment to Survivor, which is even more repetitive. There has to be room in every TV schedule, I guess, for an appointment of eternal familiarity, a Latin Mass of television.

What's yours?

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  • 1

    Interesting post!

    1) Jeopardy - I don't watch it often, but it has stayed comfortingly the same for years (as opposed to Wheel of Fortune, which I also rarely watch but makes more of an effort to jazz itself up). With the exception of Alec Trebek's mustache (sp?), that is. That was definitely a tough adjustment. . .

    2) House - I'm a recent convert, and watched all the back episodes in a marathon this month. While its definitely not as ritualized as survivor or Jeopardy, it usually follows a comforting pattern: Meet the patient. Cameron or Cuddy try to get House to take a case. He doesn't want to do it, because he's busy watching soaps or listening to music or being an ass. He makes a handful of standard diagnoses and is told that they are already overruled by the folks in the emergency room. He pops pills and takes the case. He and the ducklings brainstorm at the board. Its not auto-immune, sarcoidosis, or vasculitis. It might be an infection, but they can't know which, or it might be something else, and they face a dilemma whether to use steroids or broad spectrum antibiotics - and if they're wrong, drumroll please. . . the patient will DIE. He pops pills and yells at someone, and tells Cuddy that she looks like a whore because he doesnt' know how else to indicate that he thinks she's pretty, and calls Wilson an idiot about something. House decides on a course of treatment that is obviously going to be wrong, because they're only 20 minutes into the episode. One or more of the ducklings take the case personaly because of a parallel with their own situation. House yells at them for it, and tells them that they're useless when they get attached to the case. They get all defensive, confirming his suspicion that they're personally attached. They all start analyzing each others' motives and statements. They're about to adminster the wrong treatment, when a new symptom shows up - either as they start the IV, or as they put the patient in an MRI machine to run more tests to confirm the diagnosis (i'm never getting into an MRI machine, because apparantly that's where most awful things happen!). House pops more pills and calls everyone idiots, and fusses at them for not completeing the MRI inspite of the seizures/bleeding/vomiting/hysteria. The team has to stay all night running random (or alphabetical) infection tests, even though House has already decided that its probably not an infection. The ducklings mostly complain, although one will stick up for House's tendency to be a genius. The patient gets worse, with new symptoms that rule out all previous ideas, and they're back to the drawing board. House pops two more pills, and then two more a minute later and proposes a crazy treatment theory based on a new diagnosis, and Cuddy gets worried that this might actually be the day that House gets it wrong and kills a patient and she gets sued and will lose her job and not get to spar with him anymore. She tries to overrule him and push another direction, he goes behind her back and either kidnaps the patient, drugs the patient so that the patient will show the symptoms that will confirm his diagnosis, locks her out of the room, or just ignores her. House pops pills, realizes that his latest brilliant theory is wrong, and goes to talk to Wilson. They talk about other things, until Wilson says something about that other thing that House realizes is an apt metaphor for what's going on with the patient. House storms in, stops treatment, and announces his brilliant diagnosis and starts a new treatment and the patient is better in minutes. Closing reflections, and. . . cut! I love it.

    3) American Idol - very structured, predictable in format, predictable reactions from Ryan, Paula, Randy, and Simon.

  • 2

    My ritual is Sunday Night Serious Dramatic Television. This goes back years on HBO, starting with The Sopranos and including Six Feet Under, The Wire, Deadwood, Rome and others. Lately Showtime series and Mad Men have filled the gap. I mostly watch news and comedies throughout the week, but I'm not invested in those shows the way I am with Mad Men. I really think this is the golden age of the one-hour drama, kind of like the late 60s/early 70s was for the feature film auteur.

    I guess now that Mad Men is over I'll be getting my drama fix from True Blood, which I like but don't love. The Life & Times of Tim is probably my favorite new series of the year, though. Just hilarious. Seems like a lot of the dialogue is improvised, which gives it a much different feel than other animated series.

  • 3

    Law and order: CI --and I have no problem with Vince D's alleged 'overacting'...

  • 4

    Definitely the Daily Show. It's not quite as ritual now that I watch it all online, but it still feels like a four-times-weekly communion with the High Gods of Humor, all praying for sense and decency in a political landscape where it will never occur.

  • 5

    Fringe! *Ba-dum-bum*

    (Seriously hoping they break out of the formula shortly, or I am done.)

  • 6

    I can't believe you left out
    "Immunity! Back up for grabs!"

  • 7

    "Take your spot on the mat."

    "[Winning Tribe], gettin' your first look at the new [Losing Tribe]. _____ voted out last night."

  • 8

    [...] had been gone. But as I have said recently, I have made a resolution not to judge people for their comfort-TV-viewing habits. (We'll see how long that lasts.) Will you be watching? And more important: How do you phonetically [...]

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