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Robo-James' Time Machine: The Kids from C.A.P.E.R.
Before The Jonas Brothers, before iCarly, before Hannah Montana—yea, even long before Saved by the Bell—there was the Saturday-morning live-action kids' show. Like any good child of Generation X, I have chunks of my brainsphere better reserved for remembering physics equations and American history instead stuffed with memories of Electra Woman and Dyna-Girl, Lidsville and Shazam! Earlier this year, Will Ferrell tried to monetize this Gen X nostalgia with a big-screen version of Land of the Lost.
No one will ever try to make a movie, successful or otherwise, of The Kids from C.A.P.E.R. I cannot remember exactly what it was about, except that there was crime fighting, secrecy and a character who went nuts when he heard the word "bananas." I remember that it existed for a short time, debuting on NBC in 1976, the year of the Bicentennial and Swingtown. And I remember that I loved it. Watch with me the credits of The Kids from C.A.P.E.R., reader, and then let us savor the details:
In no particular order:
* Looking back now, I notice pretty quickly that all the "kids" looked about 30 years old.
* I am continually amazed how long credits were back then. You could fit an entire Disney Channel interstitial mini-episode in there. More to the point, you could fit three commercials in there. Good God, did no one need money in 1976? No wonder the economy was in malaise!
* I love the number of scenes that get you ready for excitement by showing a character walking up or down a set of steps. Apparently steps were considered pretty bad-ass back then.
* Oh, Doc! He had the looks—and the brains to catch the crooks! You can tell that he's got the brains because (1) he walks into a library and (2) he talks on some type of radio/phone the size of a shoebox. Which, in 1976, was like having a jet pack. As for the looks: dig the leisure suit. Day-um!
* The show was produced by Don Kirshner, who was also a producer on The Monkees. And indeed, the Kids produced a full-length LP, to less success. Tell me if you find it on eBay.
* I'm not sure why it's the character named "Doomsday" who (1) is the animal lover and (2) has a singing voice two octaves lower than everyone else's. This was probably my first exposure to the concept of irony.
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Wow. I don't remember that but I wish I did. I do remember watching a show that was set in a post-Apocalyptic future (that looked suspiciously like the California desert). The heroic family traveled around in a very sweet future RV. And I named my first kitten Shazam.
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LOVED Ark II. Thanks for reminding me of it; that'll have to be the subject of a future post.
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@jimatl: That's Ark II you're thinking of, and which I was just going to post about. I suspect the reason my ultra-liberal dad had me watching the show is that it wasn't just about a postapocalyptic future, but a postapocalyptic future brought about by environmental catastrophe. And, of course, the jet pack. (The opening is at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=63_lcQUdxxE.) James, I don't remember The Kids from C.A.P.E.R., although the theme song tickles a brain cell or two. Who knew walking into a library could so define a man of action?
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Oops. Try this link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=63_lcQUdxxE
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Before I go on at somewhat uncomfortable length about "The Kids from C.A.P.E.R.", I remember a small detail about "Ark II"; it featured a super-intelligent chimp named "Adam" (get it? get it?). Funnily, I remember one of his lines, "They no catch me! I run!"
Real smart monkey. Reeeeal smart.
In any case, as a fellow who watched this show regularly, C.A.P.E.R. stood for "Civilian Authority (for the) Protection (of) Everyone, Regardless", which was ALWAYS succeeded by a four-part sung "Ta-da" by the Kids, and an air-guitar/scat solo by P.T., which was usually truncated.
This is the first version of the theme song. Later shows had a few different sequences, including all of them doing a sped up Can-Can.
Does it bother anyone else that three of the four of the Kids not only sing, but sing in double-tracked voices?
Two running gags were that if Bugs heard the word "bananas" he would go well...bananas. This happened every episode. "Doc" was brilliant and even though he was the one that the ladies liked, he was fairly unaware of his animal magnetism. Sometimes (I think), women would look into his eyes and strings would swell on the soundtrack and they'd go into some sort of love trance.
They solved crimes in their home town of "Northeastsouthweston" a name a shade too long for its sign, the "on" extended past the borders of the sign. Another regular character was a reporter that had an authoritative voice, yet lived with his mother. All episodes began with a segment with no dialog, just sight gags, a conceit that is certainly absent from current kids TV. And yes, like the Monkees, all of the episodes featured a song. I can recall "A Hero in the Movies" and "Riding a Rainbow".
Here are the episodes and what little I can recall from them:
"Dunga Gin" - A girl named Ginny with a penchant for DUNGArees. She also wanted to be a member of the Kids. All I can recall is that she danced with P.T. at the end of the ceremonious "Ta-daaaa". She's a better girl than I am. I mean that she..I'm a man and Kipling's line was...oh, skip it.
"The Postmonster General" - A villain. He was the only Black person I can remember from the show. He did have my favorite line of the show, "I've got to beat those kids to the punch. Or better yet, punch those kids to the beat! (singing) 'I'm so nasty, I'm so nasty'". Well, when I was twelve, I was a-laughin'.
"Nanny Noony" - This one was about the town's favorite babysitter. She minded everyone, including the reporter (when Mother leaves town, she minds him). So beloved is she, the Kids have a song about her. As Doomsday sounds a bell note with his nose, they sing in a faux-operatic manner, "Sweet Nanny Noony/Nanny Noony is nice!" She, however, is tired of her perfect image and looks as if she is on the verge of snapping if someone else brings along another "sweet" child, she says that she doesn't know what she'll do. Nevertheless, someone does bring a boy to her, who is a brat. Fearing that she will do something horrible to him, the Kids find that he was not mistreated, but severely disciplined. She made him do chores, suspecting (rightly) that he was not just a brat, he just needed direction. Upon finding this out, the Kids reprise their song to her, over her protests:
Kids: (singing) "Sweeet Nanny Nooo-nee..."
NN: You've convinced me!
Doomsday: Not yet!
Kids: "Nanny Noony isssssssssss...."
NN: You've convinced me!
Doomsday: Not yet!
Kids: "Nice!"From what I gleaned from the Internet Movie Database, some of the episodes were written by Romeo Muller, who also wrote for the "Jackson 5" cartoon show as well as "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer", which is to say that the gags held up pretty well, considering the benign neglect that '70s kid shows suffered from at the time.
Having re-watched "The Phantom of the Drive-In" on YouTube, I was annoyed by the laugh track and applause track, but the episode held up reasonably well (and I even remembered one of the last lines!), even though I wouldn't show it to a twelve year-old, for fear of boredom and, let's face it, there are better kids shows nowadays. Not all, but some are better. It was fairly obvious that Kirshner was trying to re-create the Monkees' success, but it was a better attempt of this formula than the "New Monkees" from what I have been able to glean, NM having left the air before I got a chance to watch it.
Like Mr. Memory of "39 Steps", this took a long time to remember, but I'm glad I got it off my chest.
So, whatever happened to the class of '76? (according to iMdb)
Steve Bonino (P.T.) didn't seem to do much acting past 1980, but did do some soundtrack work as recently as 2003, so I guess he could and can actually sing. He has a website:
http://www.stevebonino.com/Cosie Costa (Bugs): Acted as recently as 1996 on film. He also starred in the abominable series, "California Fever", which if I remember correctly featured a battle of the bands in one episode between "Four on the Floor" and "Rest Room"; you can guess who won. "Babylon 5" fans may remember him as "Abbut"
If you want to or must see a bit of "California Fever", go here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cKQOrcpuR9U it's the episode I remember.
Must...bathe...unclean...
Biff Warren (Doomsday) - No credits past 1980 and if the iMdb is correct, passed away from AIDS in 1993, making a woman named Phyllis a widow. He was on "As the World Turns" as "Mark Stevens". Started singing at the age of 11.
John Lansing (Doc): The only "Kid" with a 2009 credit, albeit with a fourteen year gap before that. In a weird coincidence, he and Costa have both been on "Walker: Texas Ranger", in different episodes. He was "Anthony" on "Laverne and Shirley" for three episodes.
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[...] posted an obscure, little-read remembrance of an obscure, little-watched kids' show from the 1970s: The Kids from C.A.P.E.R. And just now, someone posted a comment that may well qualify as the definitive scholarly work on [...]
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